Bachelor's house hunt - A Mission Impossible

There are a few category of people, like terrorists, anti-social elements and bachelors for whom house owners never rent their houses. This happened during May 06, when I was a bachelor. I was on the verge of getting fedup with bachelor accomodation, sharing a single room with 3 other roommates, one big lizard, rats and bed bugs. There is no thing called 'individualism' or 'territoriality' in bachelor rooms. Everything is common to all, thankfully leaving aside toothbrushes and underwears.
One thing I can never digest is, my roommate being a T.Rajendar fan, playing his songs in my lovable SONY music system. Just imagine waking up to T.R's tunes everyday. That's when I decided to move to a small house (don't read as 'chinna veedu'!) and get it set for family life in future.

Velachery was already in its initial stage of commercial boom and with TCS around the corner, house owners were turning into greedy evil demons. Why to blame them? IT professionals are ready to pay whatever they charge. Next comes the issue of renting out a house to bachelors.
When our country is in the hands of a "bachelor" President, why can't they give a 500 sq ft house to a poor soul bachelor?

"Free Ads" got a new subscriber and I would be the first one to get a copy and start calling the houseowners around Velachery. Most of them would disconnect the phone, the moment I say that I am a bachelor. Many expected a community certificate and a Vegetarian family guy.
One particular advt. caught my eye because it flaunted a double bed room flat near velachery in a well connected area. I called the house owner immediately. When I said I am a bachelor and a strict non-vegetarian, he didn't cut the phone. Instead he asked me visit the house in person at 7 PM. I had to wait for entire 12 hours with fingers crossed and I was there at the house at sharp 6.59 PM.

There were a few other people lined up to visit the house too. Wooooowwww! What a beautiful apartment with great interiors? I have never seen such an artistically designed doors, stylish tiles, spacious hall etc. I fell in love with the long rectangular hall with a big hook in the ceiling, a perfect place for hanging a swing. I got tensed and lost nearly all my nails. I swore to God that I WILL GET THIS HOUSE AT ANY COST! I waited till the house owner sent off all other prospective tenants. I gave out my 10 lakh rupees smile(Indianised version of million dollars smile) and spoke very softly about my wedding engagement. I lied to him that I would be getting married in 2 months. He never seemed to worry about my marital status and looked like he was willing to rent the house to a bachelor than to a family. He took me to the routine tour, opening the taps, asking me to taste the water and exaggerating all info about the house. It didn't matter since I was already impressed and convinced. The rent and advance was within my budget and only then I smelled something fishy and spooky that they charge very less for such a beautiful double bed room apartment. Is the house owner on a time warp back to past or is he such a good-natured gentleman.? Wait! why did the people in the adjacent houses gave me a "Oh-Poor-Soul" look?

The house owner was uneasy and was sweating profusely. He was trying to tell me something , but was at loss of words. I gave a re-assuring look and he started slowly saying that a North Indian couple lived in the house before and had a guest from Assam who was a 30 years old mental lady who had come here for treatment. In the houseowner's words " There had been an attempt to suicide in this house by that mental lady. She had used the hook in hall's ceiling to hang". Suddenly I felt difficult to swallow. Anyway, I make up my mind that it had been just an attempt to suicide. So I asked him about the lady. He said, she was taken to the hospital and she died on the way. Jesus! this doesn't fall under the category of suicide attempt then. THIS IS A SUICIDE!

Slowly I looked up at the hook. I couldn't imagine a swing there. Instead I could visualise a mental lady hanging with her tongue out.... I felt a chill down my spine as the wind blew hard and the lights went off.... I started running for my dear life....

Back to the bachelor's room, I was happy to be with my roommates, lizard, rat and bedbugs around... rather than being at a stylish apartment with my mind envisaging a hanging mental lady...


P.S: Now that I am married and live with my wife, the idea of living in that haunted house is no more scaring :-)

Posted in: Humour